Writing music since 11 AM

Yep, and I recorded a song idea and uploaded it on my SoundCloud. It's on private though. I made some of my friends and Mom listen to it and they loved it so I guess I'm going to continue working with this song. A friend of mine said he loved the "old feeling" and that he thinks this kind of music suits me so well and that I should keep this up. He thinks it's so natural when I play this kind of music. I sound natural. I think I get what he means. It feels natural. I do love ROCK N'ROLL but this kind of music I'm up to feels more natural. I don't have to like struggle so hard to be able to make a beautiful song. I hope I'll find someone who also wants to play the same music. I just had bread, bell pepper and brie cheese. Yum. I'm gonna drink my tea soon when it's not too hot.

And oh btw, I and a friend are talking about what my screen name will be. Haha.
Two of my favorite musicians are both in hats and long-haired. Here they are:

 

Love these guys! :-) The music, the voice, the style and everything.

My friend thinks I should go for a sophisticated, a little dark and complicated look. I think I know what he means.

The time is 2:05 AM and I should stop writing music and get some sleep. I just can't stop. I'm having so much fun. Btw, I managed to write lyrics (a whole song) for a day just by sitting at the park in Medborgarplatsen last time. I'm satisfied with the lyrics. It's descriptive and the words just came out naturally. Beautifully. A friend of mine just said: "påminner mig lite om du vet så här random fotografier på folk på stan, fast i musikform." And I thought the same too, haha!

This thing called smoking

 

Okay, so I finally had the courage to buy a pack of cigarettes for myself. Can you believe it? FOR MYSELF! I had thought of buying them once or twice before but always changed my mind and ended up buying food instead. But today I just felt like it's time. I wanted to try buying a pack of cigarettes on my own, for myself. The first time I ever bought a pack of cigarettes was like weeks ago and it wasn't for me; it was for my friend's bandmate. But today's different. I bought this pack of cigarettes for me. I wasn't even sure what to say to the cashier. Haha. I bought my first ever lighter ever too. LOL. Then I went to Emma and practiced vocals and harmonies and everything. When I arrived home, I left my stuff in my room and went to the forest nearby. I made it. My first ever cigarette. I kind of failed though. I didn't know why the cigarette stopped smoking all the time. Hahah! I had to try many times before I could finally smoke in peace. I finished one and daaang I smell like shit now, haha. I showered afterwards, don't worry. One thing I realised is that it smells so bad and I just don't get why people smoke at all. I'm thinking of selling this pack of cigarettes and buy food instead. Or just throw them away. 

By the way, I was in Södermalm today and sat on a bench. I just felt like doing it. I was looking around, observing people and I got so many ideas just by sitting there. It was wonderful. I managed to write one song, and a diary entry which was not supposed to be written on that notebook since it's for my lyrics. People kept on staring at me, looking all puzzled as if they've never seen a person sitting there and writing on a notebook before. Haha.

En massa musikskrivande

Hej! Jag är hemma nu. Kring 5-6 igår var jag hos en polare och hjälpte honom med låtskrivandet. Han fastnade i en grej och jag försökte hjälpa honom lite med det. Vi hade tänkt dricka lite öl med men glömde nästan det för vi skrev och spela musik hela tiden. Nonstop alltså. Tror vi gick o la oss kl 2. Han öppnade en öl åt mig och jag glömde dricka upp den så den var öppnad och odrucken haha. Vi åt glass med jordgubbar iaf, det var gott. Det var massa roliga saker som hände igår haha. Först o främst, det är inte ofta man har en pistol hemma när man skriver musik liksom haha! Så random. Den är oladdad förresten. När vi spelade piano och han spelade fel hela tiden så gjorde han bästa ursäktet ever: "Jag blir ju nervös, de kollar ju på mig!" Han syftar på luftballongen på bilden som vi såg när vi spelade piano vid fönstret, hahaha! Som om de verkligen såg oss och tittade på oss liksom. Sen skrattade vi massor när vi höll på å komma på texter till refrängen (hans låt). Jag  försökte ju skriva något som typ handlade om en grej och han kom på nån text som inte riktigt passar (ännu) som lät creepy, typ "Someday bla bla bla you'll be mine" och vi asgarvade även när jag satt på toa så asgarvade jag högt. Sen så spelade vi en låtidé jag gjort till mitt band och jag skriver ju inte ofta kärlekslåtar så det här var lite mera... dark eller nåt, sen ba kom han på massa kärlekstexter som var helt ... asså opassande. Det var så kul. XD 

Just ja, det här frukost gjorde M åt mig. Tack så mkt! Frukost är en aning godare när nån annan gör det. Så gött :D

Så gött

Andra gången jag köper och äter äppelmarinerad sill och kokt potatis. Så himla gött ju.

Idag har jag inte gjort så mycket. Var typ på Midsommarkransen för nån dag sen och drack två folk öl. Tack, M! Han gjorde frukost också. Yoghurt med jordgubbar och apelsinjuice. Mys! Vi drog typ till TGR butiken med. Där har de ju LP-ram! :D Ska nog köpa när jag har tid. Vi gick till stadsmissionen lite med. Sen drog vi hem till honom igen och åt sill och potatis! Så gott :D Han gav mig massa choklad. Tror han försöker göra mig fet? :-D Kul! Åt lite. Egentligen ville jag inte äta det men äsch jag tränar bort det sen tänkte jag. Efter några Breaking Bad avsnitter så åkte jag hem och hämtade min gura och låttexterna. Drog iväg mot Odenplan och repade med bandet. En kille som heter Michael provspelade. Han var ju duktig men vi får se om det blir han eller Viktors polare. Just nu lyssnar jag på massa klassisk musik och jag kollar lite affischer som jag kan beställa på nätet. Jag vill ha en Mona Lisa, The Beatles, Hendrix och Mozart. Är lite trött. Funderar på att ta en tupplur. Ska jag göra det? Okej då.

Build own guitar

Hello, I'm hooome!

I was at my friend's place in Värmdö since Friday. We celebrated midsummer, I didn't celebrate it in Avesta this time. My friend Daniel A. was a little sad that I didn't come to celebrate it there, because he was hoping I'd come home. I forgot to message him about it and it's kind of cute 'cause he didn't start drinking as early as the others because he was waiting for me ('cause he'd pick me up and he had to be sober). 

My midsummer was fun though. I met new people, mostly my friend's parents' friends and they were all nice and one of them was very into music. He admired my guitar playing, I dunno why. He called me a genius and he asked if I had a guitar and amplifier 'cause if I didn't have any he would donate, he said. Hahaha. We ate toooons of food. I loved the food and the dessert. Also, we jammed! And I played some Hendrix and sang songs too. It was cozy. We picked flowers too to make our floral crowns. I found this cute little snail. I wanted to take it home with me but it vanished, I couldn't find it anywhere! Hahah.

I woke up this morning and I couldn't think of anything else but the guitar. I want to make my own guitar. I want to build my own guitar. I am sooo excited to make my own and I really think it'd be fun. I'd be really proud of it and I'd really take care of it, like my own baby. I would give all my love to it and I'd clean it often. It would probably be a les paul, and the colour would be something really beautiful. I can't wait to build my own guitar. Checking some stores selling guitar parts. Gaaaah. It would be a good travel guitar, or why not a gig guitar as well, if it's gig-worthy and good enough to be played at gigs? I told our guitarist about this, even she wants to build her own! :D

Ok, first time watching the tv series Breaking Bad. So far so good.

Tea? It's a little rainy. Cozy. Tea is perfect right now. 

Hello!
Before I go for a job interview, I want to write about what happened yesterday!
I went out with two friends and hung out at a park (Rålis) and we went grilling and I ate like three sausages and halloumi cheese! We fed the ducks. What the duck!? :D We were by the river (or was it a river?) and there were beautiful boats and everything. There was live music as well. The weather was not that sunny but we had fun anyway. Suddenly a cameraman and reporter came and interviewed us, haha!

And when I was in Medborgarplatsen, an asian girl came and wanted to take a picture of me and my look! Apparently she works and takes pictures of fashionista people (asian people?)! Haha. So yeah I guess Im going now so see ya later!

What if

What if a new guy you just met held your hand and gave you piggy back ride and kissed you goodbye on the cheek? What if the guy held your hand secretly under the table while you're with people sitting and having a drink in a pub? What if he talked to you a lot and smiled at you many times? If you're a girl, would this mean anything to you? Would you be left a little puzzled the day after? If you're a guy, what does this mean? Does this mean anything? Nothing?

Tomorrow, a friend of mine is coming to town and we're gonna go to an art exhibit! Also, hang out at the park, go grilling and ... wine? :D Gonna be an awesome day. Can't wait to see some art!

First times happen

So yesterday I was not sure if I'd stay home or go to a bassist friend's park hangout. I was not really in the mood. But the last minute i changed my mind and went anyway.  It just sucked because I thought the systembolaget was gonna be upon until 6 pm but apparently they close at 3pm in Saturdays so my bassist friend asked his bandmates if one of them could lend me something to drink. Of course I was gonna pay for it, but the drummer said it was fine and I didnt have to pay if I bought him a pack of cigarette, so I did - with my bassist friend's guidance since I never in my life bought cigarettes ever. hahaha! At first we were at their rehearsal space, drank some beer and played music! It was fun. I got to play the drums and the electric guitar. It was a nice rehearsal space, they can rehearse anytime they want. Patrik came too. He takes some great photos, and he's apparently their current singer, lol. So we jammed and after that we took the subway to a park called Tanto and we climbed a mountain to enjoy the one last sun and witness the beautiful sunset. We grilled mushrooms and sausages but I only had one mushroom 'cuz I bought myself salad. It was fun! We had loads of fun. They're all so funny and quirky, and good musicians too. The drummer talked to me about music and drumming and he was wondering if I was a prodigy because I play different instruments and quite good at them. I was like, 'I don't ... know.' Haha. When it started to get cold we went to a bar called Sjätte Tunnan and had my first ever mead. It was great! I liked it! Liked it better than beer actually, haha. The drummer was nice, he ordered mead for all of us. Thanks, man! That bar was a little medieval-ish and cozy! Mead, candles and all. Loved it. Btw the first bar we were supposed to go to was Medusa and we left for that medieval-ish bar instead because my bassist friend couldn't go in. The guards thought he was super drunk. He wasn't, but they thought so and there was no reason to argue. I did argue a little though, but yeah we left, and we were many. Bye, suckers. You lost a lot of customers tonight. So, we went home around 3 AM and it was fun. I got a kiss on the cheek from one of the guys. Thanks! Was a lovely day and night with you guys. Let's do this again! :D
I got a piggyback ride as well, by the way. Haha. It was so random. We were going to the subway and suddenly one of them thought of carrying me and ran down the stairs. It was crazy! :D
I lost my cap though. Although I believe it's in Sjätte Tunnan. I called them today and they said I'd call them back in an hour.  I hope it is there. I love that cap. Everyone loves that cap. :( Everyone tried it on yesterday, hahaha. It's so funny because many people usually fancy everything I wear on my head! I dont know why. Just like when I had my big gaucho hat on in Harry B James, and many people tried it on and some of them even wanted to buy it. I was like NO.
And oh, I've been called "racist" for the first time in my life, ever by a drunk, black woman yesterday when we were walking on our way home. She was walking with us and asked if I was Swedish and I think I said yeah I guess since I live here in Sweden? And then she's like no you're not, look at your eyes, nose, teeth - are you racist? You're racist!!! - I was like WOAH. I was shocked and we just walked away swiftly. She's the racist one, 'cause I wasn't even thinking about anything racist at all. I hate this kind of people! I got so angry yesterday I wanted to say something but I helped myself and just walked away. That person was an idiot, dumb, and very narrow-minded. So those were my first times yesterday. I woke up with a hangover today and I have no food here at all. I have to go and do some grocery first :( Glad I managed to go running despite the headache, haha. I feel better. :) SOOO hungry!

The drummer in the middle was glad he got to finally play some guitar because I was on the drums. Haha.

thoughts at 3:28 AM

Hi! So you're wondering why I am still up this late? Well, I took a nap and woke up around 23:00. Couldn't sleep, so I decided to make a yelp account! I'm having fun so far. I love giving reviews. I can upload photos there as well. Cool.

Right now I just want to ... go skydiving! I think everyone should do it at least once in their life. I want to face my fears! I want to push myself to my limit. Skydiving is definitely gonna be on my to-do list, and shall be done soon. Imagine the feeling you'll get after skydiving. Must be amazing. Enjoy each and every moment of your life, my dear friends. You won't get the same one twice.

Also, I really really want to move to France. Maybe stay there for a year and see how it feels like. I think I'm gonna love it there. A friend of mine says so too. I think all food and drink in France is amazing. Not only that, the French have a good fashion sense too. The arts, the culture, the history, the language - aaahh! I love almost everything about this country. I kind of like the relaxed atmosphere too.We'll see how this works out. I have my band here so I don't know if it's possible right now. But hey, wait, my band is definitely going to play music in France too! Haha :P

Paella?

Oh yeah, you hear me. PAELLA. So what about it? I realised just now how much I miss paella and that... I want it NOW! It's been ages. I really miss it! And oh I remember I tried making it once at home and my family liked it. Paella is awesome and it's not that unhealthy either. I love the colours as well. It's so colourful and it looks like a big feast! The prawns, mussels, chicken, egg, veggies and everything - gaaaah! I really love it. I think I'm gonna make it some time soon. I need to. I just googled paella and there's a bunch of tasty pictures! Some of them are funny, I thought. It just looks so random, I mean if you look at the things in it, in a big pan. Hahah. And I honestly think that, to get the best version of a certain dish, you must try eating it in the country it's coming from. I'd really love to try paella in Spain! And did  I say I love travelling? I'd really love to travel all over the world and try different kinds of food! Just imagine a lovely, sunny day in a beach or somewhere in Paris, good food, a glass of wine (or beer), good music, and good company! I can't wait. I NEED TO GET OUT THERE AND CLAIM THE WORLD!

Ano'ng oras na. 12:33 na ng madaling araw.

Ano ba 'yan. Walang katapusang pagsusulat ng musika. Nakalimutan ko anong oras na pala.
Pero ayos lang dahil nakagawa ako ng kanta. 'Yung kanta na ito e hindi ko kanta. Ginawa ko lang 'yung music. 'Yung lyrics, melody, etc. Naisip ko mas bagay ito sa singer na lalake. E may kumpare ako na vocalist at 'yung genre nila ay medyo ganito kaya naisip ko sa kanya na lang 'to. Basta ako lang 'yung composer, hehe. Tingin ko bagay na bagay ito sa boses niya. Bagay rin na kanta ito ng banda niya. Ni-send ko kanina 'yung voice recording. Mabilis ko lang na ni-record sa phone ko. Aba . . . nagustuhan niya! Super awesome daw! Gustung-gusto niya yung guitar at yung melody ng kanta. NICE! Nakagawa ako ng good song. Ang saya! Haha. Tignan natin kung gawin nila itong kanta nila.
Kanina medyo nagbabasa-basa rin ako ng libro. Di ko pa rin tapos yung binabasa ko. Baka ipatuloy ko bago ako makatulog. Sana umaga na para makakain na ako ng breakfast, hahaha. Gusto ko na ng apple,yoghurt tsaka mani. Tapos gusto ko ulit magsulat ng music. Ang saya. Ito na lang lagi ang ginagawa ko araw-araw. Buong magdamag.

Make Some Music Sthlm! Haha.

So yeah, today was a day full of music in Södermalm. We loved it and wishes it was like this everyday. Or at least the whole summer. Would have been freaking awesome. I loved the atmosphere and music definitely unites everyone. Just see the smiles on people's faces! I and my friend were there and we walked around the whole town to go on some music adventure. It was really fun. We liked two bands. We thought they were quite good. Good songs, good musicians. We ate sushi at a restaurant in Kungshallen. We were quite hungry. While walking, I asked him to sing Fix You and oh my he just sounded like the vocalist hahaha. I was almost exploding it was so beautiful ! He sang so beautifully and he was laughing/smiling because of my funny reaction hahaha! It was cozy though I just loved listening to him singing as we walked. After a long day we realised how much we wanted to go out and play music for the people and yes that is our goal and this is gonna happen as soon as we have our songs fixed!!! We're so excited, inspired and motivated. Vi e så musiksjuka! Today was a great day.

PS: Coldplay's Fix You live video on YouTube brought me to tears. Again. It's just ... BEAUTIFUL. 

Been singing and playing music

I've been singing and playing guitar and making music since I woke up. I've been watching lots of live videos of musicians I like as well. Mostly Halestorm videos. I just love Lzzy's powerful voice. She's such an inspiration right now! Been eating lots of yoghurt and nuts as well, haha. I just love them together. So good. Still trying to come up with a good melody for the verses of the song we're writing. I can't wait to hear the whole thing!

Realisation and stuff

There's one thing I realised today. It's that I will never be in a relationship if I'm gonna be this busy and passionate about music. I am saying this because I have started to notice it since last year, summer 2013. I broke up with my boyfriend because I want to prioritise music. For not a long ago I had a thing with a poetry guy but it didn't last either. This time it wasn't because of music but still, after we broke up, I realised I wasn't really meant for relationships. At least not right now. I think I can manage myself without being in a relationship, as long as I have music. The past few months I've been writing a lot of songs. I've started a rock band. I'm also working on a solo project. I'm really having fun. I think if I were to meet a new guy, he'd probably be the busy kind as well. He'd probably be as passionate as I am about career, and he would understand the whole thing, us being very busy and not having much time to spend time together and talk, but we'd still be together. Who knows, maybe he's a musician too? Maybe he's someone I will work with someday? We'll never know.

Been watching some youtube videos of the band Daughter. I like the band. I like the music. Now allow me to borrow some of their words and copy-paste them here, just because it's exactly how I feel about music.

“When I was a solo artist, I found it very, very difficult,” says the 23-year-old, with the first of many nervous giggles.
“There is nothing worse than playing in a pub or a club, or what have you, where absolutely nobody is interested. You are singing, they are talking loudly. It can destroy your confidence. It’s easier if there are three of you. You know you have somebody at your side. It makes a difference. I’m sure a solo career works for some people. It didn’t suit me at all. As a musician, I’m self-taught and felt I was restricted by my abilities.”
I totally agree here. I know I could go solo, but I realised it's not really my thing. It's easier if there are more people with you on stage. You know you're not alone. It definitely makes a difference. And yes, I am self-taught too! Wow. Such similarities. Haha. And I do feel restricted by my abilites, I gotta admit that.

“I think ‘demons’ might be slightly overstating matters. I hadn’t read that, actually. On the other hand, it’s true that everybody has a dark side. There is stuff I keep to myself, stuff which, if I didn’t write about it, maybe it would consume me. So, I don’t know, it could be ‘demons’ is true, in some way. Of course, I appreciate the irony of my having all these subjects I never talk about — and then going on stage and singing about them. It is a bit of a contradiction.”

"Music was the only thing I really enjoyed. It wasn't great at school. Music was something that I put all of myself into. It's something I naturally wanted to pursue." OH YEAH. I KNOW THAT FEELING.

"It was the moment where I thought well now is the time to go and do what you want to do and see if it works and see if you can have fun and live from it and so far it's kind of worked pretty well."

"I want to challenge our sound and just kind of expand it and experiment with different styles. I don't think we need to necessarily be contained into a small box." SAME HERE.

Music is the thing that excites me the most in life. I feel really good about it.

Home sweet home

So I'm back in the big city.

Last Friday I woke up around 8 to fix myself. My train was leaving around 9:45 or something like that and I was quite excited because I could finally visit Mom again. My train arrived almost an hour late. I got picked up so it was cool. I gave my presents to everyone in the house and they seemed very pleased. I'm glad. :-)

Around 6 pm I was picked up by a friend and we cooked dinner at his place. It was nice!
I have not been here in ages.
I have not been here for ages.
I have not been here since ages ago.
It has been ages since I was here last.
It is ages ago that I was here last.
It is ages since I have been here.


Okay, I'm just testing this sentence in different ways, haha! I just think it's fun. But yeah, it's true, I missed the F-town a bit. Nothing much has changed, still the same old F-town. Boring and dead, haha! At least we had fun. He prepared food and I didn't even need to help, haha. We had a candle-lit dinner. How cozy's that?! :) I appreciated his effort. I guess he was thinking it's been ages since we saw each other last, and that I am not in A-town that often. He bought me a bottle of red wine because I asked him to. It was the easiest way to go since the time was running and only he could do that. We played monopoly but didn't finish because we thought it got a little boring. We talked a lot about everything. We had lots of things to tell 'cause, as I said, it's been ages! I had a lot more to talk about than him though, haha. I got one beer from him as well. I stayed overnight because it was already very late. We had breakfast and watched a very funny movie called The Benchmarkers. Hahaha. I was really entertained. I thought it was really funny. Definitely my kind of sense of humor.

He drove me home around 3:30 PM and we went to Eskiln to buy ice cream. I noticed he used his leather jacket. I wonder if it's because I was wearing leather jacket too? Hahah. Anyway, the ice cream was lovely. People were kind of staring at us when we were at the store. He showed me a good place to hang out in summer too. Never seen the place before but definitely a must-visit! It was beautiful. Apparently there's some kind of event in F-town so we went there too. There was a live band and they were good but I was checking out their gears a lot. Couldn't help it, haha.
We walked around. Looked around. We didn't buy anything but once again people were staring at us as if they never seen a girl in black clothes before. Hahaha. Finally in A-town again, and he stepped out of the car to give me a hug. Yes, I do give hugs - for FREE. You better come over and get some before it gets priced. So I came home and there were lots of food. Mom was gonna have a girls' night, celebrating her birthday. The food was great. I fell asleep afterwards. I was only thinking of a nap but woke up after 3 hours, haha! Then I messaged my close friend Ida if we could meet up for a beer and have a little chat. We went to this bar that used to be ugly and dark and boring... but we were so surprised to see a completely new bar! I wonder if it's the same owner, but I can't deny the bar was beautiful! Amazing. I liked the new atmosphere. Fresh and very rock n' roll! The lp records framed on the wall, autographed guitars, drumsticks, drumheads and large music photographs on the walls! I was really happy. I don't usually feel happy when I visit A-town 'cause I think it's a really boring place, but when I saw this I got really glad. The music was good. Better than the other bars. Although sometimes they go from rock to something else. They should work this out, haha. We had one beer then we left and ate something at home. Ida stayed overnight. We woke up around 8:30 and had a quick breakfast then walked to the train station. I had to meet up with my close friend J first. We had a little fika and I told him about my band. I thought I already did but apparently not, so he was surprised and happy. He said he wanted to audition, but he's busy. We are going to have our last audition this Tuesday. It was nice to see him again. When I arrived home, I cooked food and felt weird afterwards so I took a nap. I woke up and decided to clean my place and renovate a little, haha. Now it feels more like a place where I can be more productive. I put some of my vinyls on the wall and now it feels much better to make music this way.

I showed this to a friend of mine who's also very passionate about music and he thought it looked really nice and he wants the same table as mine. Then I told him about what I feel about renovating my place and that I wanted it to look as artsy as possible because it makes me feel more motivated to work on music and stuff. He agreed and he said he wanted to do the same with his place and I think he wants me to help him out so yeah, I'm definitely up for some interior designing! :)
Right now I'm just trying to finish eating up a bunch of chocolate I got from my little brother. I am trying to avoid these things but unfortunately I keep on getting them. When my real running shoes arrive, I will absolutely forbid myself from munching these things! Must focus on training and eating healthy.

Anyway, I really think my place looks and feels cozier now!